Saturday, February 28, 2009

Untitled. Undecided.

Salam, allo! :D

Alhamdulillah, after a loooong
year of waiting incessantly
(ceh, tak smpai setaun pown),
akhirnya, majalah sekolah edisi 08
berada dalam genggamanku! :D
My poem was one of the ones
that were featured, Alhamdulillah..
Here it is the poem that I'm talking about:

Ache on places never thought I had

All mixed up, abundant and sad

My heart tends to sized up overnight

It doesn’t beat like a feather as light

As I clutch my knees to my chest

I shed blue tears on my cheeks

My heart can’t beat any longer

I was in pain and sore

My feet were difficult to lift

As I slumped to the coarse floor

Nobody took a second look

Neither concerned nor cared

Opens and closes like a dull book

As I shut my weary eyes

Waiting in a long night

Neither hoping nor wanting

I heard a distant footstep

Crept nearer and nearer

As the sun rays enter my eyes

I witnessed a beaming smile

From the jovial face I knew
I knew it swept many blues

From the gentle eyes I knew

It’ll lead me to see a new dawn

From the firm hands I knew

I knew it’s someone I’d depend on

From that, I comprehend,

It was a friend.

~ amNas, April 30th '08, 11.59 p.m.


The person that was called a "friend" in the
last verse actually depends on the reader.
It could be your :
mother, father, best friends, classmates, teachers
whoever actually, that's the magic of poems.
Besides expressing yourself in an alternative way,
the poem actually falls upon the reader's imagination.
For example: Reader A could interpret in a way that
could be the opposite of the interpretation of Reader B.
Err, harap2 faham apa yg saya cuba nak sampaikan.. :P

I'd like to thank Amirah for helping with some verses in the poem :)
Anyway, I don't think my poems are that good cause
most of them are just the straight forward kind, just obvious.
I think I was focusing to much on the rhyming part x) HEHE.
NVM. Hmm, unlike Amirah's, she makes really good poems! :D
I particularly liked the one that's about the war in Palestine
[look up for it in her blog: "Amirah Shukri" in the Blogger Buddies section]

Today, I'd like to show a poem I've been working on.
For the past few years [ceh, bunyi cam dah lama sangat je x)]
I usually make poems that centered around
the people I love and involved with,
about my parents, my friends and my teachers :)
But now I'm making a poem that is not what I usually make.

Well, see it for yourself and
tell me what you think, ok? :)
Btw, note that my work
is not exactly the right kind
to be compared to the the works of
A. Samad Said, William Shakespeare,
Emily Dickinson or William Butler Yeats.
Not even close, okay? x) Ohrait, here it is..
Oh yeah, one more thing, this is only
a preview, only one part of my poem,
since I'm still working on it and
the stanzas are all messed up so
I'll show you the rest when it's ready, insyaAllah :)
Here's the preview:

"In the time when despair and agony
Paid an unfortunate visit
We didn’t came to You
We request for its curb
From the ones that are with us
In times of merriment
From the ones that vanquish
In times of our anguish"


Well, that concludes the preview :)
Mainly, this poem is about how we
dread miseries that befall upon us and
we blame Allah s.w.t for it, astaghfirullah.
But at the same time we never prayed
Or make an effort to solve our problems
We aren't grateful for the success He blessed,
the riches and wealth He bestowed upon us.
We disobey His orders which led us to the path of loss and doom.

I made a lot of research for this poem,
visiting religious sites to increase my knowledge
and because I didn't know most of the translation to English
since I learned the phrases and verses in Malay.
I also got some help from thesaurus and dictionary websites
to increase the depth of vocabulary in my poem. The websites are:



There are others besides, but I lost track of it.
Nevertheless, I'm grateful that I visited the religious websites
because it really opened my eyes. Alhamdulillah :D
I recommend that you visit the first two websites.
You won't regret visiting it, insyaAllah :)

Oye, I'd like a verse like this to put in the poem:

"In Jahannam (neraka, hell) the pain, unthinkable,
In your Jannah (syurga, paradise) I'm not eligible"

Hmm, or something like that. But the stanzas are still messed up
so I haven't found the appropriate places to put these verses yet.
Plus, I haven't put a thought about the title yet.
So, UNTITLED it is for now x)

I'm also in the state of confusion as to whether
I should refer to Allah s.w.t in the poem as You or Thy.
For example: "Grant us Thy forgiveness, for Thy are forgiving."
Hmm, harap2 saya akan dapat pilih yg terbaik nanti InsyaAllah..

Hmm tadi on the way turun bukit sekolah, dok bual dengan Alya.
I was talking about the profession that I'd prefer in the future.
InsyaAllah, kali ini tetap. I want to teach English & Biology! :DD
HAHA, cam reti sangat je Bio.. Nak "kecek" BI pun susah nak buka mulut..
Nak tulis tu takpelaah. Hmm, takpe...
Yang penting, ada minat yang tinggi dan niat yang baik,
usaha yang berterusan dan konsisten,
berkat Allah dan ibubapa dsb, kan? Fighting! Fighting! :DD


Maybe many would recommend being a lecturer as the pay
is higher and it doesn't require much dedication and all that..
That's the point. I don't want to receive my pay for nothing.

Alya pown berpendapat camtu. Apa2pun,
saya tak tahu sgt pasal kerja jadi lecturer ni,
so maybe I shouldn't judge it like that..

Tapi yang saya tau nak jadi cikgu ni bukan senang.
Mesti tension lebih2 lagi kalau murid2 yg diajar
tak peka kepada apa yg kita cakap kat depan.
Err, saya pown sbrnya hendah buat pengakuan;
kekadang saya sendiri pown, err.. tak peka.. :P
Hmm tu susahnya nak jadi cikgu, teknik kena betul,
cara penyampaian kena menarik & all that jazz
Tapi takpe, I accept that as a challenge :D

Hmm, dunnolah.. Kita hanya mampu merancang,
semuanya terletak pada Allah s.w.t. kan?
Hmm, doakan saya berjaya dan agar niat saya ikhlas
utk memikul kerjaya ni, InsyaAllah..
CEH, cam besok je nak kerja dah.

Hmm course pown tak pasti nak amik apa lg sbnrnye..
English course kot.. Hmm, it's still UNDECIDED.
Harap2, hala tujuan yang akan dipilih betul,
membuah hasil dan mendapat keberkatan-Nya InsyaAllah.

Setakat sini sajelah coretan saya pada hari ini, okeyh??
Wasalam, thanks for reading :)


Saturday, February 21, 2009

February Update :)





Salam . Allo! :D

Err, this is probably the most lengthiest blog post I've posted, so bear with me ^^  and I hope you enjoy reading the stories I have to tell, kay? :)

Orait, it's been quite some time since I updated so errrr, here is the update :D  Well, it's hard to believe that it's February oredey, but when I thought about it long and hard, time moves just how fast it should be just like before, according to Allah's willMaybe I haven't been spending it wisely, Yeah, maybe I haven't I think.. Well, next year I will be sitting for my SPM examinations, InsyaAllah jika ada rezeki, and according to the teachers (repetitively), this year's no honeymoon year. Well, I pray and I hope that I could appreciate and spend time wisely, in the future, InsyaAllah.. Just as soon as I finished this post. [what?? blogging is a good hobby to spend time on, what... xP]

I'm grateful to Allah because without Allah's will, I won't be able to breathe, eat, and all today. Alhamdulillah.. Ohrait, here's the real update on what's been going on the first few weeks of February. But err, first off, I'll report on what happened somewhere in January 26th

Well one of my very best friends, Alya, emailed to me that she received a letter regarding an offer to a boarding school. Well somewhere last year we applied for boarding school just out of for the sake of trying, but we promised that we won't accept it. 

Well, I told her that if she wants to go, it's her choice. This is a life-changing situation and either choice will be life-changing and to rely on Allah, because Allah knows best and we are his servants, hamba yang lemah dan hina.. But, she told me that she won't accept the boarding school offer because she wanted to take extra subjects which boarding schools is against. Well deep in my heart, although I said that I would be okay either way, I didn't want her to go. Heck, if someone has to depart with his/her friends, of course he/she wouldn't want his/her friend to go away, right?

She also said that she doesn't want to burden her mother what with the expenses and all. That is a sacrifice and as sons/daughters, we should be thankful to them because without them and Allah's will, we won't be here today.. They took care of us, fed us, taught us from right to wrong, provide us with necessities and luxury.. Maybe this bit of sincere kindness from Alya is to show how much she love her mother and we should always believe that Allah s.w.t. always repay the deeds we've done, no matter how small, insyaAllah.. Well I'm happy she's not going and insyaAllah we'll succeed in SPM just how good as boarding school students would be :) or better :P insyaAllah.. 

Yang penting, amalan2 yang dilakukanmestilah dibuat dengan ikhlas. Sincerity plays an important role, according to hadith:

 
"Semua manusia rugi kecuali orang yang berilmu. 
Semua orang yang berilmu rugi kecuali mereka yang beramal. 
Semua orang yang beramal rugi kecuali mereka yang ikhlas.

In translation [insyaAllah, it's the right one]: 

"All humans are lost except those who are knowledgeable. 
All those who are knowledgeable are lost except those who perform good deeds. 
All those who perform good deeds are lost except those who are sincere." 


Oh rightie then, let's start off with my February update with February 7th on Saturday. It's Wawa's birthday party :D and Wawa's farewell party :[ She would be going to Johor to study there, and, so all 7 of us [me, amirah, aishah, mariyam, hanisah, hanim, amal] planned to make a small get-together at Hanim's house. We never planned a party before, but since Wawa is leaving, we planned to make it a very special birthday/farewell party for her. 

We baked cookies and drew cartoons & greetings on mugs, made a graphic birthday present and brought a frame to display a picture of us. Baking the cookies was the fun part, although the first few tries wasn't going well, the cookies are edible and more importantly, though, very good :D 

With guidance from our mentors, Amal Arif & Aishah, we baked away the cookies.. And ate away the cookies too ;D But, due to the orders of our great sifu, Aishah :P we can't eat the cookies till Wawa make an appearance. Well, due to shyness [malu] we decline Hanim's mother to serve us lunch because we're already planned the party to be at her house, so we wouldnt wanna burden her anymore...

So, we were quite hungry.. Hence, Amirah and I frequently take SOME cookies while others weren't looking.. HAHA :D And much to our surprise, when we confessed to Aishah and Hanisah that we err, stole the cookies, Hanisah confessed the same thing too. Heks elehs..  (>_>)

We waited for the guest of honour [wawa] to come.. which is a quite of a loooong wait btw. She finally came so we ate the cake and cookies together, gave her the gifts and all. Wawa even bought us pizzas. She expressed her gratitude in saying that she would give us extravaganzaaaa [or something like that] gifts on our wedding. HAHA XD we'll be waiting ;P Btw, thanks to Hanim for offering her place to hold the small party :) We had a lot of fun.

On February 15thabout two days after we found out that Hanim is also going to leave :( because she received an offer to a technical school [dunno if it's a right translation to sekolah teknik :P] she planned to go to the Curve with all of us. It is an another farewell/birthday party [Aishah & Mariyam's birthday] but in this case farewell/birthday trip. This is the second time I've been to a shopping mall with my friends, the first being with Alya, Airina, Shamira [she has gone to boarding school too] and Hidayah to OU which was a BLAST too :DD

Well, back to the story, Hanisah can't attend, so only 7 of us are going. First off, we went to SunComic at Cineleisure to feed the cravings of the others on animes. Well, I'm still a junior anime-an, and I'm not really a fanatic so I watched them drooling over the display area, [haha, they're not drooling lah :P] and all. After that, we went bowling, Amal & I [yeahh, the two Amals :P] shared the fees, so we would be taking turns to bowl. Wawa & Hanim took the same actions as well. 

I was the first one to bowl, and much to my surprise, I... jeng jeng jengg.. I scored a STRIKE! :D wow.. let me repeat.. STRIKE!! :D whaaa... tak sangka betol! :DDDD Unfortunately, the tries after that weren't exactly a strike.. nor was it the-slash-thing either.. A correct form of statement would be "going down the drain".. :P HAHAHAHAK.

Here's the result:

#1 Mariyam
#2 Wawa && Hanim
#3 Aishah
#4 Amirah
#-1 Amal && Amal (Amnas. Me.)

The first and only strikers which ironically, falls into the last spot, which was the Amals.. :P Hehe, nevertheless, it was quite fun though :D [we striked, ok?] X)

We went to the Borders bookstore, while the others were rampaging excitedly over in the comics section, I went to the second level of the renowned bookstore, trying my best not to head over to the novels section [which I went to anyway and managed not to buy any of those.. pheww...] I went to the reference books section.. 

What I find is : a section of a rather small shelf of  a rather old collection of reference books. 

Strangely, I even found a chemistry topical/reference [not sure] book in BM! Ehh, edisi bila tu?? Hmm, well, I'm not really sure which edition that was but maybe it was a guide in BM or something.. Tak taulah, well, nevertheless, books on university courses and such are plenty though.

Well, the reason for my "thriftyness" is because the month before, I already bought three novels [two books are still unread being Saridah Hamid's Surah-surah Rindu && Sally Nicholl's Ways to Live Forever <-- *it's not a guidebook, it's a noveland the month before that [December 08] I bought 3 novels as well, so I promised my parents I'll buy some useful things such as reference books this time. Plus, last year, in November 08, I went to OU with Alya, Airina, Shamira & Hidayah, I spent quite some money too. [kiranya ni kes kesesalan menakluki sanubari lah ni.. :P]

Well I found out that the MPH bookstore is better in school books while the Borders bookstore is better in story books, novels, CD and DVD collections and such.. So, I bought some stationaries instead, finding the cheapest things possible :P

Our stomachs are rumbling, and there's not much time to eat at a restaurant as Amal's aunt are going to pick the others so we went to the nearby Tesco to buy some buns at King's and went for a rather quick window-shopping at the stalls at the border of Tesco - Curve. 
That concludes our trip to the Curve :) About 4 hrs, I think.

Yesterday, February 20th on Friday, the students were supposed to have an assembly as some police officers will pay a visit and give out speeches about teenage crimes or something like that. We waited for about AN HOUR. AN HOUR. AN HOUR. For them. [I hope this is not the service they performed while doing their tasks, though

So, for the mean time, as I have my 30cm ruler with me [Amirah lend me a help to buy it for me the day before, she gave it to me that morning, thanks btw :)] my friends and I measured our feet, hands, face and all :P HAHA. Tarak kerja la katakan.. [di samping memanjatkan kesyukuran ke hadrat Ilahi atas kesempurnaan fizikal kan..] Mariyam's, Dina's and my hand measurements dominate the top spots :P I also have a notebook with me so we listed our.. err, future baby names.

HEHE, not because we weren't patient to marry or something, it's just fun to create names, dok? And it's better to be prepared in advance too :P HAHAHAHAK.

AMNAS [saya le]:
Muhammad Affan, Muhammad Adnan..  
Nor Adila Madihah
[refer to my last post]

ALYA:
Muhammad Almi Rayyan, Muhammad Almi Syazwan [hehe.. :P] .. 
Arni Nur Zarimee, Arni Nur Nazira 
[but she cancels out the girl names in the end, 
maybe a much more favourable name is in pursuit :P] 

AMIRAH: 
Muhd Taqauidin Khasif 
[macam nama anak arab je :P btw, she said 
that Khasif would be pronounced as Ha-seef.] 

HAZZ: 
Danish Daniel, Fazley Adam ..  
Siti Nurhaliza :P 
[fazley adam is quite a nice name btw :D]

DINA:  
Muhammad Amran Mukhriz, Muhammad Yusof Azman .. 
Nur Arissa Diana, Nur Suraya Maisara 
[nama2 ni dari novel2 awak ke? :P]

SHIRA: 
Muhammad Hassan, Muhammad Khairi ..
Siti Laila, Siti Khadijah 
[dia kata nak nama2 yg senang nak spell, hehe.. :P 
btol jgak, nama2 kebanyakan org skrg berbelit2 nak sebut :P]

* Well, here's a quick note why I chose the names listed above:
x)

i. Muhammad Affan berdasarkan nama Khulafak Ar-Rasyiddin yang ke-3, Saidina Umar bin Affan. Mula2 nak letak Naim kat belakang tuh supaya maksudnya kena sikit - Muhammad Affan Naim : Pendaki (Affan) syurga (nama: Naim) yang terpuji (Muhammad) Tapi kang panjang sangat plak,tak tambah nama bapak lagi. HEHE :P

ii. Muhammad Adnan cek kat buku "Amalan Ketika Mengandung & Setelah Bersalin Serta Panduan Menamakan Bayi" kepunyaan makbapak saya, maksudnya, nama datuk Nabi.

iii. Nor Adila Madihah err, sebab bunyinya sedap? :P hehe, maksudnya: cahaya (Nor) keadilan (Adilah) yang terpuji (Madihah)



I asked my other friends to put theirs too, but they haven't put a thought about it yet.. :P Hehe, sekali lagi saya menegaskan, saya ni bukannya apa, cuma rasa seronok pulak buat nama2 nih.. Hehe.. :P The police officers finally came, at first I'm interested in their speeches, but I was getting bored and Alhamdulillah, akhirnya.. masuk kelas jgak. Pastu kena tengok slideshow yang diaorg buat. Interesting jgak.. It shows the examples of crimes that we can report to, what not to do and what to do when we saw it happening to us or others.

As the bell rang, and as it was Hanim's last day, all of us hugged and all, expressing greetings of advice and the best of luck. I was really sad that one of my good friends will depart but, nevertheless, it's her choice for the better sake of her future.. I hope all of us could be successful in the future, a better servant to Allah swt, better sons/daughters for our parents and all, insyaAllah.. Semoga kejayaan sentiasa mengiringi anda, Hanim :) [tiru ayat dari Cikgu Jamal. HAHA :D]

Good luck to all the others, too;
Wawa, Hanim, Shamira, Fatimah, Amalina Azmi, Aqil, Irfan, Hielfarith (Cupi), Kam Siu Lun and others.

Pertemuan Kita Di Suatu Hari
Menitiskan Ukhwah Yang Sejati
Bersyukurku Ke Hadrat Ilahi Di Atas Jalinan Yang Suci

Namun Kini Perpisahan Yang Terjadi
Dugaan Yang Menimpa Diri
Bersabarlah Di Atas Suratan
Ku Tetap Pergi Jua

Kan Ku Utuskan Salam Ingatanku
Dalam Doa Kudusku Sepanjang Waktu
Ya Allah Bantulah Hamba Mu

Mencari Hidayah Daripada Mu
Dalam Mendidikkan Kesabaranku
Ya Allah Tabahkan Hati Hamba Mu
Di Atas Perpisahan Ini

"Teman Betapa Pilunya Hati Menghadapi Perpisahan Ini.
Pahit Manis Perjuangan Telah Kita Rasa Bersama. Semoga
Allah Meredhai Persahabatan Dan Perpisahan Ini. Teruskan
Perjuangan"

Kan Ku Utuskan Salam Ingatanku
Dalam Doa Kudusku Sepanjang Waktu
Ya Allah Bantulah HambaMu

Senyuman Yang Tersirat Di Bibirmu
Menjadi Ingatan Setiap Waktu
Tanda Kemesraan Bersimpul Padu
Kenangku Di Dalam Doamu

Semoga Tuhan Berkatimu 



Semoga Tuhan sentiasa memberkatimu, InsyaAllah :)

*
                                     
Yesterday was also my first tuition of the year to prepare for SPM. InsyaAllah, I'll be taking Physics & Add Maths for tuition this year. Yesterday was Physics at Cikgu Jamal's. Alya, Amirah and Hazirah were present too :D [Airina couldn't attend] We had a lot of fun too, what with Cikgu Jamal's sense of humour :P 

After class, we went to the Wasbudi supermarket opposite C. Jamal's and my mother and my 5 younger siblings were there too, (Dont gasp. It's completely normal) shopping while waiting for me. I offered to carry my youngest sister, Arissa [refer to my previous post's featured picture] and went to my friends and there were "pokings" all over her thighs.. Hehe, bdk tu mmg tembam pown! :P We said goodbye to Amirah & Hazirah after that [Alya tumpang] Although it's not the roomiest moment in the car [toksoh risau, Al, mmg sempit dari dulu lagi, hehe] kitaorg tak kisah sangat sebab dok gelak2 tengok telatah adik2 gue xP

That concludes my February update. It's about a week till March and I hope we could all appreciate and spend time wisely, insyaAllah.. 



Time is free, but it's priceless
You can't own it, but you can use it
You can't keep it, but you can spend it
Once you've lost it,
you can never get it back.

~ Harvey MacKay

Wasalam :)